Tag Archives: Compassion

11.27.15 Would Jesus Welcome Syrian Refugees?

Our government leaders face a difficult decision on whether to allow Syrian refugees into our country or not. I appreciate the tension they face on our behalf. Do they turn refugees away to protect us as citizens, or do they allow them here to show compassion?

Photo Courtesy @ MilwaukeeJewish.org

Photo Courtesy @ MilwaukeeJewish.org

I wonder whether we would struggle with this question if terrorists had not bombed Paris. Suppose the Syrian refugees were fleeing their country because of oppression and lack of safety? If they came to us for help, would we be receptive? My hunch is yes. However, we do have the Paris bombings as our context. Now it appears we’re more resistant to allowing Syrian refugees into our country out of fear.

As Christ-followers how should we respond? I believe Jesus calls us to show compassion. Here are some key Scripture passages we can apply in this situation:

God expects us to show compassion.

Ps 82:3 – “Defend the cause of the weak and the fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and the oppressed.”

Ps 103:8 – “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.”

Ps 146:7, 9 – “He upholds the cause of the oppressed and gives food to the hungry. The Lord sets prisoners free. The Lord watches over the alien and sustains the fatherless and the widow, but He frustrates the ways of the wicked.”

2 Cor 1:3-4 – “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all of our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.” 

Col 3:12 – “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility and patience.”

God made us in His image, so we should reflect Him by serving those in need. We glorify Him when we choose compassion toward others.

 

“Do Unto Others as You Would Have Them Do Unto You”

Matt 7:12 – “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.”

Can you imagine having to flee your homeland to find peace and safety for your family? If you arrived on the borders of a foreign land, wouldn’t you want to receive compassion and mercy? These refugees are desperate for help. They must feel emotionally and physically exhausted. Let’s reach out to them and give them the help and care they need. All they have is the shirt on their backs.

Photo Courtesy @ Flickr.com Creative Commons in Bank Collection

Photo Courtesy @ Flickr.com Creative Commons in Bank Collection

“Whatever You Did for the Least of These Brothers, You Did for Me”

Matt 25:35-36, 40 – “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in. I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.”

Matt 25:42-43, 45 – “For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in. I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.”

The Lord is watching us. He knows who is taking care of the needy and those who have turned their backs on the hurting. He makes it clear that when we minister to the broken, it’s the same as ministering to Him.

 

“Love Your Enemies” 

Matt 5:43-44 – “You have heard that it was said, “Love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you: love your enemies.

The Syrian refugees are not our enemies. They are running from terror, not bringing it. They are not ISIS who pronounces us as their enemy when we aren’t looking for a fight. One way we can love the Syrians is to not label them as “potential terrorists.” They have enough stress without defending who they are not.

 

“Do Not Fear”

God is bigger than our real enemy, who is Satan. We are NOT up against “flesh and blood.” God is quite capable of protecting us as we serve those in need.

When God delivered the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt, they were in unchartered territory. He gave them a set of rules to follow to foster community, one of which was “Do not mistreat an alien or oppress him, for you were aliens in Egypt.” (Ex 22:21) But here is what He promised to them as He led them to the Promised Land: “If you will listen carefully to what my angel says and do all that I say, I will be an enemy to your enemies and will oppose those who oppose you.” (Ex 23:22)

Matt 10:26-28 – Jesus said, “So do not be afraid of them…Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell.”

Satan is the author of evil and fear. When we Enemy ensnares us in fear, we are right where the wants us. Let’s remember that Christ who is in us is greater than he who is in the world! (I John 4:4)

 

Where do you stand? Do you think we should keep the Syrian refugees out to protect ourselves, or show compassion? If you have a minute, please share your welcomed thoughts below. 

 

Blessings,

Lee Ann

7.24.11 High Maintenance or High Calling?

Quagmire: an awkward, complex, or hazardous situation (OED). 

Many of you know that I moved to Austin to help care for my father, who is in assisted living.  Up until recently it’s been relatively straightforward and simple: I’ve made grocery runs for him and stopped by to check up on him regularly.  That was all I was able to muster given the major life transition I had just made by moving back here and trying to establish a sense of normalcy in my own life.  Now that the dust has started to settle, I’ve moved into high gear with Dad. We’re in the process of transferring his financial responsibilities to me. Because of my extensive professional experience in finance, I believe I can provide him the most meaningful help in this area. I had no idea what I was getting into. I thought it would be as simple as getting my name on his checking account so I could sign checks and then paying a few bills on a monthly basis.  But the number of hours I’ve spent trying to sort out Dad’s finances are beyond anything I could have expected, and I can’t see the finish line. The word “quagmire” comes to mind. 

The problem is that the help I am providing is not exactly the kind of help Dad is seeking.  He is looking for someone to help him pay his bills without raising questions about how he spends his money. I am not only going through bills, but I am reviewing credit card statements and checking accounts as well as unhooking over twenty bank drafts (with his permission) for charitable donations.  Dad gives at the drop of the hat, and it takes just one piece of mail for him to say “yes” and fill in credit card data and send it on. Here is just a sample of what I’ve uncovered regarding Dad’s finances and some of the questions I find myself pondering: 

  • Major credit card debt is building each month.  What kind of purchases has he been making?  Are his financial needs greater than his income?  This needs to be analyzed.
  • He pays for two hospital indemnity plans.  Are we submitting claims to get reimbursed when he’s hospitalized?  He has spent many days in a hospital since I’ve been back in Austin.  I have scrambled to file claims with his two insurance companies hoping to get some reimbursement.  It’s a waste of money to pay premiums and then not utilize the benefits when the need arises.
  • Over twenty bank drafts and monthly credit card charges were going to charitable organizations using money he doesn’t have.  I had to unhook all of them to free up the cash.
  • He was making double payments for backing up computer files simply because he had forgotten that he already had this service in place.
  • I continue to discover multiple online orders for things that can be easily picked up at the grocery store.  We are doubling the cost of the product due to shipping charges and credit card interest.
  • He has a strong tendency to overstock. For cash flow purposes, he needs to learn how to buy in moderation.
  • As a retired military officer, he has benefits at the VA that he wasn’t even aware of.  I am trying to figure out as his Power of Attorney (POA) how to get access to this.  He has been paying for years what apparently has been available to him free of charge.
  • He wants to tithe, and I want to support him in that, but then he has to control his spending.  It can be accomplished, but he will have to understand what he needs to give up to do it.  He loves to give, but he’s not in the same financial position as he used to be. 
  • He has three medical insurers.  By the time a claim gets sifted from the primary carrier to the second and third carrier, there are balances still left to pay.  These bills are coming in from multiple providers.   How do you know which bills he really needs to pay versus those the providers are suppose to write-off based on usual and customary charges?  This is a whole different world, and I will be on an exponential learning curve as I try to get a handle on this.

Have you tried unhooking bank authorizations with an institution that likes your money?  Imagine sitting at my Dad’s apartment with cell phone in hand calling multiple organizations to inactivate bank drafts while not being the authorized person on the account.  We get a representative on the line…I introduce myself along with the purpose of the call…they ask to speak to my Dad…they verify his identity…Dad struggles to remember some of the data they are asking for and looks to me for assistance…I provide the answers to the security questions…and then Dad authorizes the organization to talk to me.  The process is cumbersome, and at times flat out irritating.  It infuriates me when I am asking someone to stop a bank draft for free credit reports or fraud protection, and they keep trying to sell a lowered benefit when we just want out!  Some of these organizations will not let you give notice in writing that you no longer want the service.  They say, “We’re sorry for the inconvenience.  (That’s hooey. These organizations are NOT sorry.  They need to quit reading their scripts and listen to the customer!) The only contact information you can find by statement or on the web is a phone number. 

It’s a bad sign when I tell Dad that I have put together a budget, and he replies, “Budget?” Dad hasn’t operated with a written budget for years, so he has no motivation to control spending and live within his means.  If he needs something, he just goes online and orders it. “Dad, you need to see the visual of how your fixed income is being spent,” I told him “and then you need to see the additional money you’re spending through credit cards.  You’re digging a deeper debt hole month by month for items you don’t need.”  This leads to another problem.  He and I have two different concepts of “need”.  I emphasized that God is providing the income he needs to have a roof over his head, clothes on his body, and food to eat.  Those are the needs the Lord promises to provide and tells us not to worry about. Dad’s definition of “need” is ordering 6 months worth of supplements with another 6-month supply already at his apartment.  

I am so thankful I have a POA because it gives me much latitude to assist Dad.  But just because I have the Power of Attorney doesn’t give me the right to take over unilaterally.  It gives me the legal right to take matters into my own hands, but I have an ethical and biblical duty to manage his affairs in a way that gives him dignity and honor.  You might think this is pretty clear-cut, but I find myself swimming in many shades of gray.  For example, it’s tempting to fix these financial issues myself by closing credit cards or by lowering limits on them so he can’t run them up. I could make decisions that are “best for him” without his input.  However, my Christian testimony is at stake, so I want to manage his finances in a way that honors him, which means including him on decisions that need to be made, even though I will spend more emotional energy dealing with his need to be in control.  I want to control his finances and empower him to make good decisions around spending to help him stay solvent and start paying down some credit card debt. However, the last thing I want to do is to control my father.  

I have shared what has been going on, but the greater question for me is how I will go about serving my Dad.  It’s one thing to have a black belt in budgeting and help Dad see his financial reality, but it is another to do it compassionately.  

I am writing with sadness in my heart.  My father has a master’s degree in Physics and another in Mathematics. This is a man who obtained one of the most prestigious scholarships in the Navy and had the privilege to work under Admiral Rickover (remembered as the “Father of the Nuclear-powered Navy”).  Dad worked in nuclear-powered submarines as a Navy officer and engineer.  He retired as a Lieutenant Commander. As a civilian, he worked as an engineer, but his love for teaching led him into the high school classroom teaching algebra, physics, trigonometry, analysis, calculus and Russian for over twenty-five years. He learned Russian as an adult to communicate with the Russians he was trying to reach for Christ. Dad is a very intelligent man, and it breaks my heart to see a mind that had such acuity slip so many gears that he can barely move out of neutral and get any traction in his day. A man who has been known for being meticulous in everything he did can hardly talk about what he did in a given day.  When he leaves a voicemail, he will forget midstream why he is calling.  It is not uncommon to walk into his apartment and find him just sitting in his wheelchair and having no idea how long he’s been there.  

As my father, this man deserves my respect and honor.  He is my top prayer warrior. He has told me over the years, “I consider it my highest privilege and responsibility as a parent to pray daily for my children.”  I can’t begin to tell you how much that ministers to my heart to know my Dad prays for me!  His prayers are a daily gift from God. 

I am in Austin for such a time as this.  If I focus on the hours I’ve spent on Dad’s behalf, it would be easy to label him as “high maintenance.”  However, if I focus on how I am going about investing these hours, then I will see this venture as a “high calling.”  I am on a journey with my Dad.  We are in our seats with our seat belts on, our tray tables locked, and our seats in their full and upright position.  While holding his hand, I expect this transition to have many bumps with occasional turbulent patches.  I will clothe myself with compassion (Col 3:12) as the Lord requires and love him through this time the best way I know how and leave the results up to the Lord.  I pray that the Lord will constantly remind me that Dad is more mentally vulnerable and to maintain sensitivity at all times.  His memory lapses will continue to happen, and he will get online and order things he forgot he already has or didn’t need.  I will feel frustrated when those times occur.  Over-spending will undermine the work I have invested to get his financial house in order.  In the end, I can only control what I do for him.  I love my Dad.  He deserves at a minimum the very best I can give him with the Lord’s compassion and mercy.  It’s a high calling.  Someday I will be looking for the same compassion and mercy from my own caregiver. 

Blessings,

Lee Ann

1.17.10 Do You Give to Everyone Who Asks?

Living in Austin has presented a new theological  tension for me.  To introduce this tension the scriptural framework for today’s reflection comes from Luke 6:27-38:

27“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. 30Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31Do to others as you would have them do to you.

32“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ love those who love them. 33And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ do that. 34And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ lend to ‘sinners,’ expecting to be repaid in full. 35But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

37“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. 38Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

I heard Andy Stanley preach on this about a month or so ago, and it has stuck with me.  First, he sets the record straight that there are two verses within this passage that are often pulled out of context.  The first is “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you (v.30)”, while the second is “Do not judge, lest not you be judged (v.37)”. 

Andy challenges the listener to read this passage in its entirety and see for yourself that the two above verses have everything to do with GIVING TO ANYONE WHO ASKS-  even if it is your enemy who is asking for help.  Why? Because not only will your reward be great, but more importantly, we are to be merciful just as our Father has been merciful to each of us.  After all, He is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked, which was all of us before we placed our trust in Christ for our salvation.  Thus, when we embrace that we are all on a level playing field before God and have experienced His mercy, then it also follows that we are to be merciful by not judging others who ask for help.  Jesus’ message is give to anyone who asks and do not demand it back or expect repayment.  We can’t use the excuse that someone is our enemy.  We can’t judge others by sizing them up and determining if they are “worthy” of being helped as none of us were worthy of His mercy, but He was merciful to us anyway. 

Now that you have the scriptural background, let me share the latest tension.  When I lived in Hutchinson, not once in the 15 years that I was there did I see one person standing on a street corner panhandling.  My experience in Austin is quite the opposite.  Everyday that I drive to work and get around town, there is a panhandler on almost every corner.  I see 1-2 panhandlers/day.  These panhandlers are getting sophisticated in their asking for help.  I documented their signs verbatim while sitting at red lights:

“Giving is like sharing.”

“Need Work – not giving up –God Bless, Happy New Year”

“Happy Holidays and New Year”

“Happy Holidays – Anything Helps – Thank You”

“No gimmicks, no lies, just need a little help”

“Willing to work – hungry – WWJD”

“It’s going to be sooooooo cold tomorrow – please help”

“Will work – need help- Thanks”

“Homeless and out of work – anything helps – even chump change”

“In need of an angel – anything is a blessing – thank you”

“Cold, hungry, God Bless”

“Can’t find a job – need to survive- legalizing God’s Word”

“Blind Texan – God Bless”

“Homeless & Hungry – need help-everybody needs help sometime – God Bless”

These are people who are asking, and I could roll down my window and give what little cash I tend to carry in my wallet any way.  But here’s the tension.  Years ago when I had lived in Houston and saw panhandlers everyday, I had a pretty calloused attitude toward them because I was quite judgmental of them.  I had preconceived notions that they were manipulators who were lazy and wanted easy handouts.  I made the assumption that they would take the money and buy alcohol and cigarettes with it, and why would I dare enable such spending?  I also believed that by my rolling the window down and giving them cash was only rewarding their decision to stand on a street corner to ask for money.  It didn’t help when the Houston Chronicle did a feature that indicated that some of these panhandlers made $30K/yr by standing at a major intersection by the Galleria Mall on Westheimer! 

This tension is very real for me.  My flesh wants to judge them, or point them to organizations who are designed to give to those in need to relieve possible guilt, yet I believe the scripture is quite clear that I am to give to any person who asks.  What if they would take cash and buy alcohol?  Who am I to judge that or to assume that?  When it comes to giving, should I use discernment about who I give to? If yes, then isn’t that a glorified way of saying I am judging a person and their circumstances?  Am I being specifically asked just because I happen to see a panhandler’s sign sitting at an intersection?  Am I off the hook if the light is green and I never had to stop at the intersection? 

While I am resolving this tension, I am going to err on the side of giving to everyone who asks.  I think I am going to pursue McDonalds gift certificates so that I can give a meal to someone in need and know that I didn’t judge them or ignore them.  I look forward to the day I can roll down my window and not even feel a tension.  When that happens, I know I have quit attempting to judge the panhandler. 

Blessings,

Lee Ann

5.3.09 Helping the Poor

Sunday, May 03, 2009:  I have reached a point of frustration as it relates to helping the poor.  Jesus states that we will always have the poor among us, and he states that if we give a cup of cold water to the least of these, we have done it to him.  There are numerous passages that tell us that God desires for us to reach out to those in need.

My frustration is that I have mostly helped the poor over the years by throwing money at various organizations.  I think giving to organizations is certainly a viable way to help those in need, but I think Jesus is actually calling us to do more than just send a check.  So the question becomes, “How do I intersect the lives of the poor, the homeless, etc?”  I can assure you that they are not knocking on my front door in a nice neighborhood; nor do they come to my office; nor do they show up at the church I attend.  I am isolated from the poor like many of you.

This week I decided to do something about this.  With the help of a dear friend, we decided to show up @ 6:45am last Monday at one of our McDonald’s that tends to attract a “different” clientele.  We brought devotional material and prayed that God would bring to our table people who were struggling and perhaps start building a bridge to them, learn their story, listen for their needs and begin helping the poor in meaningful ways.

Well, we were disappointed because the clientele looked mostly like us; however, with ten minutes left before we both needed to head to work, the cashier who took our money for coffee took a break and wandered over to our table and asked what we were doing!  We gave her a thumbnail sketch, and she ended up telling her story: birthed 9 kids; no father in the picture; works two shifts to make ends meet.  When she left our table, my friend and I were in awe that God honored our attempt to reach someone who needed the help and spiritual encouragement.  We left feeling very affirmed that we’re on the right track. 

The following day I was at a gas station, and a lady walked by who didn’t appear to have much to her name, and I simply smiled at her and said, “Hi”.  Upon the initial contact, she rounded the pump and asked me if I could spare $5 (smiling with no teeth and only gums visible).  In times past I would say “no” because I’d worry about them taking the $5 and buying cigs and alcohol.  Not today.  I was reminded that the money in my pocket is God’s money that I have been asked to manage, and I just felt she needed the $5 more than I did.  I gave it to her and said, “God bless you”.

This week’s spiritual journey has been teaching me that the poor is all around us and that we need to be spiritually sensitive to those around us.  My friend and I are going to keep in touch with the cashier, and we are going to look at the Soup Kitchen and see if we can’t be “regulars” on a weekly basis and see if we can build some relationships and help them beyond a meal.

Blessings,

Lee Ann