Tag Archives: Goals

12.30.15 Why Most of Us Don’t Achieve Our Goals

According to the Statistic Brain Research Institute, only 8% of people who make New Year’s Resolutions achieve them. Why do most of us quit before we barely get started?

Photo Courtesy@Flickr.com/nadap_usnavy

Photo Courtesy@Flickr.com/nadap_usnavy

I set goals every year, but like most of you, my zeal to do them starts to fade as the months go by. Never mind that I set SMART goals, i.e. Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-bound. Forget that I calendar the sequential steps to accomplish them. I set myself up for success, but I lose my enthusiasm and don’t take action. Does that happen to you? Does it frustrate you? Let’s fix this.

I had an “aha” moment I want to share with you. I listen to podcasters like Michael Hyatt, Ray Edwards, and Aaron Walker. They are experts at goal-setting. They share their “secrets” on how to meet them. I read Start with Why by Simon Sinek two years ago to help me know my “why” behind every goal I set. But, Mr. Walker made a statement in a recent interview that grabbed my attention. He said, “Set goals that you WANT to achieve.” Aha! That may sound obvious, but it unlocks for me why most of my goals aren’t reached. The majority of my past goals were set because I thought I “should” pursue them.

Here’s the application for the lesson I learned. I trust it will be helpful to you as you set your 2016 goals. Set goals that are not driven by an underlying thought of “I should.” For example:

  1. Lose ten pounds by March 31, 2016 (because I should).
  2. Read the Bible in a year (because I should).
  3. Walk ten thousand steps a day (because I should).

Many experts add their own ideas for why most of us fail at achieving goals: no accountability, no tracking mechanism to measure the progress of goals, too many distractions in our environment, goals aren’t listed where you see them daily, etc. Those are all true. But if we WANT to complete our goals, the above reasons for failure are overcome by our strong desire to finish our goal. Nothing will stand in our way!

So, unless we WANT to lose ten pounds or WANT to read the Bible in a year, it’s not going to happen. Sinek’s suggestion to “start with why” is valuable, but to make it stick, our goals need a “why” driven by “I WANT to do this!” We can achieve the above three goals if they look something like this:

  1. Lose ten pounds by March 31, 2016 (because I WANT to look and feel good).
  2. Read the Bible in a year (because I WANT a deeper relationship with God).
  3. Walk ten thousand steps a day (because I WANT to enjoy the outdoors).

As we look toward 2016, let’s ask ourselves, “What goals do I WANT to fulfill that doesn’t have a hidden ‘should’ behind it?” Give yourself permission to pursue something you WANT to do. But if we create goals laced with “should,” then we have to muster up self-discipline and determination to keep us going.

Let’s make goal-setting fun for 2016. Let’s be honest with ourselves and make sure we know why we WANT to attain them. If you’ve already set your goals, I encourage you to restate them so that you have identified why you WANT to do them. If you set any goals grounded by “I should,” then toss them – unless you have an unlimited supply of willpower!

Are there lessons you’ve learned about goal-setting you’d like to share below? What is one goal you WANT to realize in 2016? I would love to hear one of your goals for 2016. I’ll start with a fun goal. I love jigsaw puzzles, but since my move to Austin, I haven’t put one together. I have a 6,000-piece puzzle portraying the Wedding at Cana that has been on my shelf for seven years. I need to buy a table to accommodate the dimensions of the puzzle and set it in a cat-free zone, but I WANT to do this!

May 2016 be your best year yet! 

 

Blessings,

Lee Ann

 

 

 

 

 

 

12.31.14 Three Steps to Achieve Your Goals for 2015

New Year’s Resolutions don’t work for multiple reasons. Most of us make half-hearted commitments as we begin the New Year. Statistics show that 25% of all New Year’s resolutions are abandoned after one week.¹ 60% are abandoned within six months.¹ Most of us make the same resolution over and over without success.

What if instead of half-hearted resolutions, we made meaningful goals for 2015? What steps might we make to accomplish them?

1) WRITE your goals down! When you write down your goals, you increase the probability of accomplishing them by 42 % according to a study by psychology professor, Dr. Gail Matthews.²

2) You must understand your emotional reasons behind the goal. Knowing your emotional “why” will motivate you to keep going when you’re tempted to quit. It’s a good idea to write this down, too.

For example, many of us have been overweight at some point in our lives and have set goals to “lose twenty pounds.” We know we should lose weight in order to be healthier, but that knowledge is not particularly inspiring. If we are going to succeed at losing weight, then we need to connect with our goal emotionally. For example, “I am going to feel great when I can move more freely.” OR “I won’t have to hide under sweatpants and tunics.” Hearing from your doctor that you should lose weight usually doesn’t work. “Shoulds” and “oughts” will not inspire us. Let’s not fall into that trap for 2015. For every goal we set, let’s make sure we tag the emotional “why” behind the goal, which will enhance our chance to succeed.

3) We need to pray about our goals. As Christians, God has told us that if we want to succeed with our goals or plans, we should submit them to Him:

“To man belong the plans of the heart, but from the Lord comes the reply of the tongue.” – Proverbs 16:1

“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.” – Proverbs 16:3

“In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.” – Proverbs 16:9

God invites us to ask His input. If we have made plans that are outside His will, the Lord will give His reply by redirecting us. If we want success with our goals, then God needs to be integrally involved. He tells us to “commit them to Him,” and He will help bring success. Moreover, He will show us the roadmap to get there. It doesn’t get any better than that!

As you make your goals for 2015, I invite you to write them out, find the emotional “why” behind the goal, and then prayerfully submit them to the Lord. Review and pray over them at least once a week. If you invite God to lead you in your goals, 2015 can be your best year yet!

Blessings,

Lee Ann

¹ According to http://www.statisticbrain.com/new-years-resolution-statistics/

² Dr. Gail Matthews, psychology professor of Dominican University in California

12.27.12 What’s Your New You Resolution?

     Are you tired of making New Year’s Resolutions that fade by February? Me too. My personal favorite is setting a goal to exercise at a gym because they have the wonderful equipment. I can’t tell you how many gyms I’ve signed up for over the years. Organizations like Gold’s Gym and the YMCA have my number, and I bet they have yours too! These organizations are cash cows in January as we all register with well-intentioned goals for self-improvement. So why do the majority of us consistently fail? 

     I think our failure is setting the outcome as our goal instead of focusing on the character traits needed to accomplish our goals. If the desired outcome is losing ten pounds, then the trait of self control is vital to our success. This basic insight has become my secret sauce to leverage a New Year’s Resolution and apply it to spiritual growth, and I want to share it with you. Let’s call it our New You Resolution. 

     Try setting your New You Resolution based on the trait you most desire to develop in 2013. Then convert your goal to develop your desired trait into a daily prayer. I started this practice in 2007 when I desired to have Jesus’s character trait of being a generous giver. So my daily prayer in 2007 was “Lord, help me to be a generous giver just like you.” The results continue to bear “much fruit.” I still pray this prayer because I see God’s continuing transformation in my heart. I promise you that God will do the same for you if you will invite Him to be a part of the process. 

     May I share my New You Resolution for 2013? It is my prayer that by disclosing it, you are inspired to set your own. Here’s mine: 

John 15:5

“I (Jesus) am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” 

The above verse is the underpinning of my New You Resolution. If I want to see spiritual growth to be more Christ-like, then I have to be connected to Jesus. Apart from Jesus, I can do nothing. 

My Confession

I have experienced the conviction that I need to exercise “great faith.” Jesus uses this phrase in Scripture. He admires it and rewards it. Jesus gave all of His children His authority and power with the expectation that we would use it. Instead, I have not always shown “great faith.” I shared in a previous post an example of when I failed to exercise “great faith” to pray over my writing coach when she suffered a slipped disc in her back. 

My Correction

My 2013 New You Resolution will be this prayer, “Lord, help me to be your follower, someone known for “great faith,” who risks often with a humble heart to bring healing to others.” I desire to pray with people who have physical illnesses. I desire to pray for people who are in spiritual battles. I desire to pray with people who need emotional healing. I desire to lead others to Christ and experience spiritual healing. Jesus wants to reward “great faith.” I believe Jesus wants to show up in all of these prayers with all kinds of healing as long as God gets the glory (see John 14:12-14). But I can’t rush headlong into this without spiritual preparation. 

My Commitment

First, if I am not following the leadership of the Holy Spirit, this will be a disaster. I am committed to being spiritually sensitive to know when He is giving me opportunities to leverage His authority and power to bring about healings. Second, I am committed to help others be at ease before I pray over them by sharing the following preamble: 

  • I acknowledge that I am a sinner who is not worthy to be His instrument. I am not a spiritual giant. There is no such person. We only serve a giant God. God is just looking for someone to risk with Him! I don’t have a greater connection to God than the next person.
  • All prayers are answered according to His will. Since we don’t know God’s will for another person, we need to accept that if He chooses not to answer our prayer, then it’s only for a benevolent reason. For example, illness can draw us closer to God. We can learn to consider it joy to experience trials and tribulations, and we can learn that we are completely dependent on God.
  • If He doesn’t answer our prayer, let’s understand that this is not a spiritual indictment of your faith in God, or mine. Because God is always in control, we trust Him completely for the outcome.
  • No matter what the result is, know that God loves you deeply. An unanswered prayer is in no way an expression that God loves you less.
  • When God does answer our prayer, we both have to be deeply committed to giving God all of the glory and share our testimonies as God opens doors to do so. 

My Conclusion

When December 31, 2013, arrives, I want to look back on the year knowing that I exercised “great faith” often, using His authority and power to change the world through all kinds of healing. So many people are hurting and without hope, and praying over them will not only communicate genuine care, but they will have hope in our loving Father who desires to minister to them. In the end, if I remain in Jesus, He will remain in me. 

 

Blessings,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Lee Ann