Two U.S. born Muslim women decided to have lunch at Austin’s popular Kerbey Lane Café last Sunday. Leilah dropped off her friend, Sirat. While Leilah was parking the car, Sirat stepped inside to get a table. An elderly white man inside the Café watched Leilah park the car and turned his attention to Sirat while he was waiting for his table.
“She should just go back to Saudi Arabia where she came from,” he said.
“Would you repeat what you just said?” asked Sirat.
“She should just go back to Saudi Arabia where she came from,” he repeated. “And the same goes for you,” he continued. “Do you have a gun on you? Just go ahead and shoot me,” he said.
By this time a Kerbey Lane employee seated him at a table. When Leilah and Sirat sought help from the employees about this man’s abusive words, they said there was nothing they could do. Leilah decided to approach the man, and he didn’t hold back. In front of the entire restaurant, he said the same things to her as he did to Sirat. And not one person stood up for them.
Sirat, in tears, turns to Leilah and says, “Just go. Everyone knows we were told very racist things, and this restaurant doesn’t feel the need to address it because who cares about us?” And somebody called out, ‘Nobody.’ And we left because it was true.”¹
Leilah, a Kerbey Lane Café Customer
These ladies went to Facebook to post their thoughts after being the victim of bigotry. They said, “We have never felt more dehumanized and humiliated than I did this morning.” They stated that the patrons silence was the most painful part of their experience.
Their story forced me to consider whether I would have defended them or not. Would I have been so stunned that I would have become one of the silent onlookers? What about you?
It’s obvious that tensions are rising in America. We take for granted the freedom and protection we enjoy in this country. But acts of terrorism are now too close to home, and we don’t feel the same safety in our own homeland as before. Muslim Americans, who have legally immigrated to America, are feeling increased hostility and persecution toward them. We read about radical Islamists who commit acts of terror, and we wonder if our Muslim neighbors share their ideology. It’s hard not to be prone to this kind of thinking. However, many of our Muslim American citizens are like us. They want to build a life for their families and enjoy peace and freedom. They want to make a meaningful contribution to our society through their work. They want their children to have the same opportunities to build their own future like we did.
How does our Christian faith inform us in this situation? These women experienced hostility and ill-treatment because of their race and perceived religious beliefs. Here are several passages to consider as possible applications:
Psalm 41:1 “Blessed is he who has regard for the weak.”
Psalm 72:13-14 “He will take pity on the weak and the needy and save the needy from death. He will rescue them from oppression and violence, for precious is their blood in His sight.
Psalm 82:3-4 “Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.”
I wouldn’t classify these women as “needy or oppressed,” but I do think they were the weaker in this situation. I believe God calls us to defend the weak, but how should that have looked at the café? If anyone had made a stand for these women, would that have provoked a man who was already antagonistic? Would a defense of these women escalate the situation? What if the man was carrying a gun? I bet there were patrons who wanted to help, but didn’t know what to do. Thus, they remained silent. Unfortunately, I think I would have been one of them. I wouldn’t want to endanger others by intruding in the situation.
But remaining silent is also problematic. As Simrat Jeet Singh, an assistant professor of religion at Trinity University rightly stated:
“Not speaking against prejudice when we witness it sends the message that we do not feel strongly enough about our values to stand for them. Remaining silent sends the destructive message to perpetrators that we agree with their actions, while also telling those who are targeted that we believe they should be victimized.”²
If a Christian response demands that we defend these Muslim women, as they deserved, how would it have looked? I am earnestly seeking an answer because this may not be the last time a situation like this could arise. There are multiple variables to sort through. I look forward to your thoughts. You may comment below.
Blessings,
Lee Ann
¹http://www.statesman.com/news/news/local/muslim-woman-recounts-bigotry-at-kerbey-lane-cafes/npddn/
²http://www.mystatesman.com/news/news/opinion/singh-silence-at-kerbey-lane-speaks-volumes/npfMz/
LeeAnn,
You are so right! When a confrontation arises such as what you just wrote about, it hurts my heart to think that someone has the audacity to speak to two women from any ethnicity or religious back ground. I was thinking as I was reading your blog, what would I do, I would love to say that I would stand up and defend the two women but in all reality, I like everyone else would have sat and not moved for fear of retaliation. I hope if that situation ever arises that have have the strength to make a stand and I pray that God gives me the correct words to use.
Thank you for such a thought provoking subject! I feel so sad for the two women and even sadder for the man who felt the need to speak out at the two women. Maybe God will use the situation to His glory!
Love you!
Jana
Dear Jana:
It is a difficult scenario! You said it better than I did in the blog – it’s “fear of retaliation” that probably held back many patrons at the café. If acts of violence go on the rise close to home, I bet these kinds of confrontations will also be on the rise.
Isn’t it interesting that fear is becoming a driving force in our decision-making? Of course, I am hoping it was “wisdom” that was exercised by the patrons in this situation. However, if we are going to help the weaker or those who are targeted because of their ethnicity, I love your thought that we would have the courage to make a stand and trust the Spirit of God to give us the words.
Maybe the answer is to pray now, before the next situation arises, that God would use us in the future to spread God’s peace and do this with His words and without fear.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Jana!
Love you too,
Lee Ann
Hi Lee Ann, I’m glad you posted this situation as we may all have an opportunity to encounter it in the future. I’m old enough now that I hope I would have asked the women to sit at my table. Wish now we could send them a note to that effect or invite them to your class. It’s been on my heart lately that we need to build relations with our Muslim neighbors. When I was a teenager, segregation was still in effect; but churches would arrange for day long picnics, etc. with the teens from black churches. I believe Riverbend could be in the forefront of such a program. Thanks again for bringing our attention to this. peggy
Hi, Peggy:
I, too, thought that maybe an invitation to sit at my table would be a satisfactory response to show that I’m for civil treatment and to take the opportunity to share God’s love with them.
We do need to build relations with our Muslim neighbors. I have a sweet Muslim family that lives across the street from me, and the father is the principal at Harmony School here in Austin. He has two sweet young kids. I gave them a soccer ball that I found in my closet, and the young boy started kicking it around on the street and was enjoying every bit of it. The father works hard to always say “Hi” to me, and I try to not just reciprocate, but to initiate encounters with his family any chance I get.
We have to make the decision to be bridge-builders, or else we will become isolative.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Peggy.
Blessings,
Lee Ann
I eat at that particular restaurant with the men’s group from my church. I also know what I would do if this pathetic situation reoccurs. I would quietly rise from my seat and invite the two Muslims to join me at my table. If the bigot objected, I would simply state that I was doing what Jesus would do and to the offended Muslim women I would state, “Peace Be Upon Him.” If they chose to ignore my invitation, I would quietly leave with them. Why I would say, “Peace Be Upon Him” is altogether another comment. They and I would know precisely why I said it. The bigot would not. Keeping the faith, David Kellogg.
Thank you so much for your input on this, David. As I have processed this, I think asking the women to join me at my table would be comfortable move, and that could be a powerful Christian testimony to both the women and the bigoted man.
We may be put to the test soon, so I like that we are putting together our own game plan to deal with situations like this more effectively.
Love and Hugs,
Lee Ann
Thank you again for making me stop, think, consider, and think some more! I am ashamed that this happened in my city at a restaurant I have supported. I agree that inviting the ladies to join me would send a powerful message and be likely not to escalate the situation. I try very hard not to let fear dictate my actions even in the world we live in today but it is more difficult then ever before. I do feel better prepared if I encounter a similar situation having read your blog so thank you for sharing this.
Candy B
Thanks, Candy. I am embarrassed that it happened in our city, which is generally known for being accepting of many ethnic backgrounds. Let’s pray that if the situation presents itself again, courage will trump fear and that the Holy Spirit will give us the words as we invite others to our table!
Blessings,
Lee Ann
Dear Lee Ann, this was an extremely touching article you’ve written. It brought tears to my eyes to think I too would probably be a silent patron there.
I don’t think I would’ve known what to do. But after reading your article it makes sense now that maybe just intervening a little bit which show compassion.
I really don’t know what else to say. I just know you’ve given me food for thought and prayer.
May we all be more cognizant of what’s going on around us.
Thank you, Ro. I think many of us would have felt off guard and remained silent because we wouldn’t know what to do. I hope the next time we find ourselves in a similar position, we can simply invite whoever it is to join us at our table and quietly move on. This would be a start toward compassion anyway!
Blessings,
Lee Ann